Friday, September 22, 2017

It would be dumb to do things we can't/won't do

Michael began the week with a post about things we can't/won't do because we're busy or otherwise disinterested. Jeff followed up with a plug for a cookbook. I'm not sure what I should do here so I guess I'll combine the two things: Things We Can't/Won't Cook/Eat.

Can eat it, will eat it (because it's delicious and the single reason that ketchup should exist), can't cook it. It's meat, I get that. But how do you get the onions and breadcrumbs in there? Feed that stuff to a cow a long time ago? Then, how do you get it into a loaf shape? Is there a loaf part of the cow?
Let the culinary geniuses figure that out and bless them for their selfless work.

Could probably cook them (what is there to that besides heating them?), but won't because I won't eat them. I think they taste terrible. I also find them smug. And why are there always so many of them?

Can cook it (because as far as I can tell, all you do is take the fish out of the water and throw it right into the oven), absolutely will not ever eat it. Is an explanation even necessary? It is? Oh, okay; I'm not a sociopath. I don't enjoy looking at the facial expression of something while I eat it. Same goes for pancakes.
Avert your cold, dead, delicious gaze


Will happily eat, can not cook. Every recipe starts with flour and water, which is how you make glue. Adding eggs and sugar to glue doesn't automatically equal cookies. Unless it does. I don't know.

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