Wednesday, January 9, 2013

The Unbelievables: Name Droppers

Is this man the bane of the USA's smallest state?
You better believe it ...


Leo Von Grunwald ... aka Lee Greenwood.

He was (and still is) one of the most underhanded individuals The Unbelievables have ever come across.

Can you imagine someone low enough to play on the sensibilities of a country's pride, taking advantage of a nation's deep-seeded self-regard in order to simply fulfill one's dastardly intentions? That's exactly what Grunwald has been doing lo these decades past. He's a wily one, let me tell you.

Jeff has opened the door in telling you one of Grunwald's plots. Strange as it may seem, we owe a debt of gratitude to quite a few cronies in the entertainment industry with regard to our investigations of his subversive ways. And our efforts continue where Grunwald is concerned because the man is cunning ... and in many ways. He's rather like Batman's nemesis
The Riddler, interweaving deception with the truth in order to confuse and confound an unaware public, all the while working his ulterior motives into the mix. 

Because of our ongoing dealings with him, there aren't many details we can reveal currently about Grunwald. But we can declassify some of the "informants and moles" Jeff hinted at who have selflessly aided us in spurning many of this criminal's actions:

Kenny Rogers: Kenny has been instrumental in passing along little tidbits of information in our study of Grunwald and his methodologies. (Side Note: It was Grunwald who convinced Rogers to have plastic surgery many years ago ... and we all know how that turned out ...)

Willie Nelson: Did you have any doubt? Willie talks to just about everyone and he knows everyone. It doesn't take much "convincing" to "friend" him, if you know what I mean.

Bobcat Goldthwait: One of the more unlikely moles in our arsenal, Bobcat has the uncanny ability to get on the nerves of just about anyone. He's the perfect ally.

O.J. Simpson: Yep. "The Juice" himself. "Pre-shenanigans" of course ...

Andre The Giant: We all miss Andre a great deal. He was one of the few celebrities who made an Unbelievables party a raucous, unforgettable affair back in the day.


Bozo The Clown: *shudder* My heightened fear and skepticism of clowns forced me to plead with Jeff to deal with Mr. Harmon while investigating Grunwald. I get cold sweats just thinking about it even now. *reshudder*

Of course, these individuals are the only ones we can talk about where the Grunwald affair is concerned. There are a few more in our cadre we can't mention ... not yet, at any rate.

So, you have the introduction and driving force of Grunwald ... you have some of the background of his ways. Additionally, I was able to whet your appetite as to who we've used to aid in slowing his efforts. I'll leave it to Clark to wrap up what few details can be revealed on one of the most slipperiest cogs in the criminal mean machine.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

P.S. While The Unbelievables have affected many a proud moment for the American public, it's with a heavy heart I state matter of factly there is no possible way we will ever rid radio, television, air show, et al of "God Bless The USA." The best we can do is warn the unaware of Grunwald's machinations. 

Sometimes? We simply have to admit to ourselves: "There's only so much we can do."

(Side Note regarding T.R.O.U.S.E.R.I.N.G. It fell to me to decipher the meaning of what Grunwald's moniker was, by the way. My keen hatred of acronyms clued me in to the true definition of the name of his underground movement, unlike Clark and Jeff who originally thought it was a forgotten fashion trend from the '70s.) 

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