Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Something's not right (part 2)

Michael's right, it isn't pretty. In fact, it's downright disturbing. We can't quite connect all the dots just yet, but it would definitely appear that an enemy we had previously defeated (and frankly, forgotten), Dr. Rob Ott, has resurfaced and significantly elevated his threat level.

Some background: when Walt Disney opened his first theme park back in the 50's, Ott had been chosen to oversee The Hall of Presidents exhibit. However, he was fired and subsequently banned from all Disney properties forever before the park even opened. You see, Ott's creations, unlike the animatronic devices eventually used in that attraction, had the ability to roam about freely, initiate conversations (as opposed to reciting a scripted speech), make decisions and generally exercise free will. During a preview performance prior to the opening of Disneyland, some of Ott's presidents demonstrated tendencies to improvise inappropriately. In particular, "Abraham Lincoln" spewing a stream of racial slurs, "Franklin Roosevelt" dancing The Lindy Hop and "Calvin Coolidge" teaming up with "Andrew Jackson" to do unspeakable things to "William Howard Taft". Naturally, this horrified Walt Disney and he immediately ordered Ott's dismissal and banishment. Embarrassed, Ott immediately swore revenge and dedicated his life to fulfilling that promise.

Some years later, Ott surfaced with the intention of making good on his threat. He did so by kidnapping the beloved comedic actor Steve Martin and tried to destroy Mr. Martin's reputation by replacing him in Hollywood with the "Stevebot-9000". We were able to thwart this plan just prior to principal photography began on "Bringing Down The House 2", destroying the Stevebot-9000 and Ott's laboratory and rescuing Mr. Martin. We thought that was the end of it.

The demise of the Stevebot-9000 allowed Queen Latifah to
appear in "The Cookout". So yeah, not a totally happy ending.
However, after watching the surveillance video unearthed by Michael (and the severely out-of-character behavior of Miss Jodie Foster, trust me {wink}), it's pretty clear that not only has Ott returned, still hellbent on exacting revenge on Disney, but that he's joined forces with the nefarious Holly Graham (the twisted mastermind behind "Tupac's" posthumous "performance" at Coachella) and together, they have kidnapped all of Hollywood!

This sounds like an impossible case to solve... or in other words, another day at the office for The Unbelievables. I'll let Jeff tell you all about how we're going to shut this one down.

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