Friday, January 18, 2013

Something's Not Right - Act III

Yes indeed, something is definitely not right in Tinseltown. Clark has already let you all know about the re-emergence of Rob Ott (who now prefers to be known as Professor Rob Ott) and his cohort Holly Graham, whose alias, it can now be revealed, is that of one Anna McTronic, an ex-star pupil of Ott.

When Clark says it seems that Ott and McTronic have kidnapped all of Hollywood  he has hit the nail on the head. Almost. It seems that some glitterati have escaped their snares, and have actually been savvy enough to come to us, the Unbelievables, for assistance. A couple of them are on the horn to us right now, as I write this, spilling everything they know about these special-effects fiends - locations, methods, how they avoided capture, the lot.

What is their purpose? Who knows. But I betcha dollars to donuts it's got something to do with the age-old 'taking over the world' thing. I know Professor Rob Ott has sworn vengeance on Disney, but using all of Hollywood? If you only wanted to bring down Disney you wouldn't have to go to such great lengths. Nope, I'm pretty convinced that once Hollywood fell under the spell of Ott and McTronic they would be brainwashed. Brainwashed into doing and saying things they wouldn't normally do in order to influence the younger generation, who in turn will become an unstoppable army, marching on Washington, kicking out all the politicos (actually, we can kinda get behind that one), launching missiles willy-nilly and bringing about the Rob Ott Apocalypse. Now that we gotta stop.

But how are they brainwashing the stars? How is it that giants, legends even, such as Jack Nicholson, Clint Eastwood and Keanu Reeves are finding themselves under the Rob Ott influence? Simple. 

They have working for them the following people: Kreskin, Uri Geller, David Blaine, David Copperfield, Banachek and Max Maven (the man with the best goatee ever, I mean you gotta see this thing!)

With these six hypnotists at his disposal he has made short work of the entire Hollywood community. But have no fear folks. We Unbelievables are equally well-prepared to un-hypnotise the stars, for we have three, count'em, three big guns in our arsenal (aside from all the big guns in our arsenal, if you know what I mean - but that's a story for another time) - Derren Brown, Paul McKenna and Dynamo!

Dynamo, as you may be aware, is not only capable of performing illusions that make you go "What the...?" on a daily basis (such as walking across the Thames),

 but has also been the subject of a comic strip himself, making him practically a superhero in my book.

Paul McKenna is able to convince people to be better than they already are by the use of auto suggestion and neurolinguistics, and his books are runaway bestsellers.

And Derren Brown is able to control people's minds, pure and simple.

So with these guys on our side, we should have this whole thing wrapped up by next week. Right guys?

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