Monday, November 14, 2016
The phone rang. I was the only one home at the Unbelieva-Base that morning.
"Hello?" I answered.
"Michael," it was Jeff. "Meet me at the Stiletto Flats police station. We've got to bail Clark out of the can. I'll explain everything when you get here."
And here I thought the day was going to be on the boring side ...
I was at the station 20 minutes later. Jeff had already started the paperwork and before I took off to meet him I'd given a call to Chung S. Poon, our crackerjack attorney at law. I bumped into several police officers I knew on the way in and we exchanged pleasantries. (The Unbelievables are on excellent terms with Stiletto Flats' men in blue.) I was directed to a side office down the hall from the station's main entrance. Jeff was sitting at a table.
"What happened?" I asked him. "Is Clark okay?"
"Yeah ... seems that little bugger Petite has been up to no good. He hung Clark on trumped up charges of aggravated assault if you can believe it. The police said they had no choice but to run him in. I was at least able to pull a favor so we could spring him in short order. He'll be out in a few ..."
"'Aggravated assault?' That's bodily injury with a deadly weapon. All Clark's ever done was lift the little twit up by the scruff of his neck and toss him through a window. Granted, he's done it over and over and over again but it's all been in the spirit of necessity. Clark's never used a weapon against him ..."
Jeff agreed. "Exactly. So I don't know where these charges are coming from ..."
With bail set and the particulars completed, Clark came out and we headed for Poon's offices.
"Seems serious this time," our buddy Chung confessed while reviewing everything. The police department had forwarded the charges to him and he'd looked them over before we got there. "Apparently Petite has documented your abuses against him over the course of the last year. That's how the police were able to arrest you. He's going to use them to make his case in court," we were informed.
"That weasely little bastard" Clark mumbled. "He's worked some pretty lowdown tactics before but this one's his lowest yet. How did he record any of that? You know, it doesn't matter. Every single thing he crops up with I can justify." Jeff and I exchanged looks. We knew when it came to Petite Clark had a hot head.
Poon put down the paperwork he was looking at. "Clark, let me ask you something. Have you ever told Petite 'Enjoy your window shopping' after kicking him through paned glass?"
"Probably," Clark responded.
"Ever told Petite 'There's nothing like fall in New York' while tossing him off a skyscraper?"
"I might have ..."
"Well those are just a few of the things Petite has listed as background fodder for these charges. We'll find out soon enough. Your court date is Monday. I got them to expedite this whole affair so we can run with it pronto. Once I go over everything in this paperwork thoroughly I'll give you a call and we'll discuss the details. Meanwhile? Don't do anything. Relax and stay away from Petite."
Little did we know this wasn't going to be the cut a dried situation we thought. Petite had some real corkers up his little sleeves ...