Friday, February 27, 2015

The Nickel Tour

What do you mean "What am I still doing here?" ... ?!??

You don't listen very well.

I told you: I, Henri Petit, skilled ne'er-do-well and superior-in-every-way ultra-villain of The Unbelieva-Boobs, would be hanging around all week, mucking up my foes blog and causing various misery and mayhem for those three dolts who think they're better than me!

And here it is, Friday ... and they still haven't figured out how to foil the perfect seizure I've managed right beneath their very noses!

Bwahahahaha! Bwaaaaahahahaaaaaa!

What? What's that?

You're curious as to the photo of Betsy working diligently in my master control room at my most mechanical of wonders, The Hacktivator 2000®?

The masterpiece I built which has effectively foiled any counter-reacquisition from those Unbelieva-Dorks?

Sure. Why not? Who can blame you for wondering how the inside of a mastermind works! I don't mind giving you the nickel tour around my control room. It will serve my purposes in showing off ... and making you jealous of my superior intellect!

Bwahahahaha! Bwaaaaahahahaaaaaa!

And, because I'm such a nice guy, to make it easy for you I've numbered everything in the picture below so you can follow along ...

  1. That? That's The Hacktivator 2000®'s hypermega-brain main control, quality-made to store the most bulky of information for super-fast processing and information access. (You'll also note I've created it to be used as a handy, dandy snack vending apparatus for Betsy so she doesn't have to go far when she needs an snack break. I know ... I'm a genius!)
  2. The Hacktivator 2000®'s battery and back-up battery. Having a back-up? Crucial. Every evil-doer needs one.
  3. Another processing mechanism. It's complicated. You wouldn't understand what it's for.
  4. The filing cabinet for the detailed instructions of The Hacktivator 2000®. You know, in case there's a glitch or something when Betsy needs to look up stuff. (But that never happens ... because I designed The Hacktivator 2000®! It never gets glitches!)
  5. Circuit breaker box
  6. Whoops! That's a Starbuck's venti Macchiato I must have forgotten the other day. I wondered where that went ...
  7. That Betsy! She loves those cute kitty posters!
  8. Main control panel where Betsy carries out all my evil plans! Bwahahahaha! Bwaaaaahahahaaaaaa!
  9. Only the best in comfortable seating for my employees! Real leather, too!
  10. All I ever ask is for a little loyalty from those I employ. This is a stylish armband with a little picture of yours truly on it. It totally compliments the sweater she's wearing ... don't you think?
  11. The Hacktivator 2000® cooling unit.
  12. No smoking sign. Duh. You can't be smoking around such sensitive pieces of evil!
  13. While she's the only employee I've got, Betsy still likes to liven things up with reminder notes for social events.
  14. Hey, goals are important! And I require them for motivation!
  15. This is the readout for The Hacktivator 2000®. It spits out detailed information about power usage, maintenance reports and other stuff. It's a useful Muzak receiver as well to keep things pleasant in an office atmosphere.
  16. Ho, ho! It looks identical to The Hacktivator 2000® cooling unit to the left ... but it's actually a cleverly disguised coffee maker! Fooled you! Just like I fooled the UnbelievaJerks! Again: I'm a genius!
  17. Random evil plans for later spit out by the readout (#15 above) for The Hacktivator 2000®.
And there you have it. You owe me a nickel. 

It's been fun, but I have to go and cause more trouble for those jerkface UnbelievaJokesters. See you later!

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