Monday, September 15, 2014

It's an Unbelievable life

They say imitation is the most sincere form of flattery. In that case, we have been flattered beyond measure over the years. We've had more than our share of Un-wanna-believables. That's understandable. Who can blame those of you who aren't us for envying our super-glamorous, exciting and dangerous lifestyles? What irks us is those who try to pass off our adventures as theirs. We've had more than our share of those over the years, too. One specific perpetrator is the popular magazine "Man's Life". Yeah, right. More like "Clark, Jeff, and/or Michael's Lives, Reprinted Here For Your Entertainment But We're Not Paying Them A Dime" magazine. Even more despicable than them stealing our adventures is the fact that they recycled a relatively small sampling of those adventures over and over again. Check it out...
Okay, this happened. Vampire bats did indeed rip our flesh. And yes, the fighting technique depicted here is how we managed to survive. You can learn how to do that in one of our Unbelievinars, "Using Animals As Weapons Against Other Animals". But this only happened one time.

Look! They re-cycled the whole story, down to the cover illustration and even the headline. This never happened! Weasels are generally not known as aquatic animals. Now, there was a time when some otters got a little aggressive. But that's now what's happening here though. Shoddy.

Oh come on. As if we wouldn't be able to escape from turtles. They're slow!!

Do you see a disturbing trend and a negative stereotype being promoted? If the publishers of "Man's Life" had their way, they'd have you believe that every single time we take our shirts off and wade in waist-deep water (which is admittedly a frequent past-time), that we're swarmed by hostile creatures and have to fight our way out. That only happens about a third of the time, and always when we're rescuing slutty damsels!

Oh well. At least one positive thing in terms of inspiration came out of this...
You're welcome, Frank.

Let's see what Jeff and Michael have to say about this scurrilous rag.

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