Thursday, February 20, 2014

Speed, Dynamism, and The Like

When Michael says we invented speed, it's kind of misleading. We didn't invent it. It already existed. Speed has always been around, since before the time of the caveman running after a wild dinner on legs. Velociraptors and pterodactyls knew the advantages of being light on one's feet (or wings). So speed has been around the block a time or two.

No, speed wasn't our idea. We simply refined it.

It was while meditating during a rather superb Unbelieva-Zen session (one that took place after a fabulous meal at Monica Lewis' house - the things that lady can make with Swift's Identified Beef would make your head spin! She is so creative!)that we made the startling discovery.

Yes, we were able to unlock the key to speed. Once you know what the key is, we reasoned, you will be able to control it and make it better. Which is what we did.

Clark and I ran a few tests on our theories in the Unbelieva-lab while Michael recorded the results for posterity. The theory was now not only proven but we could immediately put the results to good use in designing faster clothes, faster shoes, faster fast food, speedier swim trunks and more dynamic hats for our own purposes.

That hat is dynamic, I trust you'll agree.

Invisible clothes - what could be faster?

We then set about making everything else we owned swifter, slicker and faster. Now we live in a place where everything you can think of is just that much faster than anywhere else. Even our broadband connection.

Clark will give you the lowdown on Friday. Meanwhile...


No comments:

Post a Comment