Quite a few years ago we did a short little series of Q&As with one of the contributors and, as a little holiday treat, we're reproducing those sessions here this week. Jeff and Clark will be along later during this last full week of the year to share their discussions.
- Playboy Magazine: "So ... do you believe in Santa Claus, Michael? And the other Unbelievables? Clark? Jeff?"
Michael: "Of course I do ... all three of us do. We've never had any doubt ... not a one of us. We may be called 'The Unbelievables,' but that only holds true of our accomplishments, which are quite unbelievable.
"But not in our beliefs. Santa is out there - he visits just like clockwork to all the good little boys and girls. That is without question and we love the old fat man because of it.
"But he isn't without his mischievous side ... something we approve of heartily. You can see evidence of this by some of the stocking stuffers he's suggested to us over the years ..."
"This little gem was one he advised we pass along to some of our fortunate lady fans: A 'head light' bra with vintage Volkswagen head lamps. (Hello, ladies!) This item has been a hit on every level each time we've given them. They really 'light up the night' if you catch my meaning."
"And these spiffy drawers have got it going on, let me tell you. They might look a little randy, but these underwear are outfitted with a special hermetically-sealed flask capable of distributing anything from keg-fresh beer to that perfectly shaken (not stirred) martini right on through to the best Cosmopolitan you've ever sipped. Shake, shake, shake ... shake, shake, shake ... shake your booty, boys.
"See? With nifty stocking stuffers such as these, is there any doubt Santa exists?
"In return, we've passed along fashion advice to the jolly old elf, stuff he's used to impress Mrs. Claus over the years, very much to her delight.
"But we'll never tell where Father Christmas gets his 'ideas' ... Mrs. Claus can just keep thinking Kris Kringle is 'the man.'
"So yes, here and now, without a hint of hesitation: The Unbelievables do indeed believe in old St. Nick. We've always treasured our special relationship with him ... we always will."
- Playboy Magazine: "Thanks for taking a few minutes with us, Michael."
- Michael: "My pleasure. And Merry Christmas to you."
Words fail me.
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