Friday, September 30, 2016

For the fluffy (and/or scaly, what have you) ones

My pet project is a project for pets.
Namely, animals in shelters becoming my pets.
Basically, I want to adopt all the animals in all of the shelters. All of them!


Or "OAATAIS" for short, although I realize that's hard to pronounce.

Here's what's going to happen:
My team and I will go to all the animal shelters and adopt every dog, cat, fluffy bunny, gerbil, snake and platypus there. Then we would transport them to my giant farm, which will be called "Camp Frolic", here in Nevada where they will be fed good food and allowed to play and romp and whatever they want all day, every day, for the rest of their days, with zero possibility of human beings mistreating them.
I realize this is ambitious in scope, but I have a plan.
  • PHASE ONE: Get money (win lotteries, make friends with old rich people, ask the internet, work, etc.)
  • PHASE TWO: Acquire real estate.
  • PHASE THREE: Build ginormous compound with a dining facility, medical clinic, air conditioned kennels, heated swimming pools and open fields.
  • PHASE FOUR: Go get the animals!
  • PHASE FIVE: Post "KEEP OUT, HUMANS!" signs all over the place.
Seriously, the WORST!
I don't have a timetable; I suspect some of these things are going to be easier to do than others. But watch for a crowdsourcing plea at some point.

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