"Eww!" - my reaction upon seeing this...
"Ooh!" - my reaction upon seeing this...
My repulsion to the idea of being stuck in a car with the repulsive Henri Petit was repelled by the prospect of being in the back of a car with the mysterious-but-undoubtedly lovely Teeta Von Deese Triplets. "Shotgun! In the middle, on the hump! I called it!", I shouted as I climbed inside. "Shotgun is not in the back, it's passenger side in the front", Michael said. "Also, you can't call in the middle, on the hump. That's the worst spot in any car", Jeff added. I nodded my head toward Petit in the driver's seat and they both yelled, "Not Shotgun!" as they jumped into seats on the middle bench. "So I'm in the front by myself then? That's just great", muttered Petit. He put the car in drive and headed for the exit as we hurled insults at him.
"Hey, where's your car seat?"None of us had asked where we were going or why. Personally, I didn't care, being as I was surrounded by three lovelies who weren't saying a word and didn't have to. But once we actually rolled out on to the street that was as empty and abandoned as the garage, Michael finally said, "where are you taking us, Petit?" The stinky tot answered, "If you remember, Tie-Po said he wanted to introduce chaos to the world, a place 'where up is down, hot is cold, foes are friends and everything happens whenever it wants to'. Now where could that happen, hmmmm?"
"Yeah, how can you even reach the pedals? Is there an even uglier man-baby on the floorboard up there?"
"Can you at least put out the cigarette, you malodorous doink?"
"Your mom's house!", I offered, which was greeted with high fives from Michael and Jeff. Michael said, "I think we can figure this out without involving the vile runt." Jeff said, "I think I already have; the answer is a movie set! A made-up fictional world where the creators make up all the rules! All these buildings are false fronts, sets for scenes from stories to be filmed!"
"Well done, Unbelievables", Petit said condescendingly. "And I am not a ru--"
"SHUT UP!", we yelled in unision.
So okay, we were on some vacant Hollywood back lot. But where were we going and what would happen next and how was I supposed to concentrate on any of that while getting all snuggly-wuggly with the TVD Triplets?
Answers to be revealed at some point soon!
~~~again with the continuation~~~
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