Monday, June 8, 2015

Send In The Clones

Something strange has been happening in Tinseltown. I mean, there's always something strange happening, but this is stranger than usual. And the weird thing about it is, we Unbelieva-types did not realise it until somebody pointed it out to us. It all started a while back when we noticed something odd about football star Luis Suarez.

He turned out to be a genetically modified mutant, created using the DNA of Erik Estrada, Adam Sandler, a piranha fish and a llama. The group responsible was called Scientific Modification Using Digital Genetic Enhancements - or S.M.U.D.G.E. for short.

We sorted it all out and thought no more of it until just recently when no less a person than Billy Ray Cyrus (another of our network of moles and informants)dropped this picture in our mailbox, with a Post-It note attached saying, "Looks like S.M.U.D.G.E. is still up to no good, dunnit?"

This got us to thinking, and we think we've come up with some pretty convincing evidence that S.M.U.D.G.E. are still out there, doing their evil mutation thang. F'rinstance...

Have you ever noticed a similarity between James Carville

 and THIS guy?

Don't you think if you took DNA from these two...

and cooked it up a little bit, you might just get

Vince Offer?
Sham-Wow! indeed. 

Not only that, but I refuse to believe that Gary Oldman was merely watching a rerun of The Simpsons when preparing to become Commissioner Gordon...

And don't even get me started on this guy...

So, folks, it would seem that S.M.U.D.G.E. are up to their old tricks. I'll let Michael fill you in on our investigations later in the week.

Oh, and by the way - they may have been up to this nonsense for far longer than we thought. Example? Well, here's famous Victorian-era poet Elizabeth Barrett Browning...

and here's this dude.

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