Monday, November 23, 2015

Unbelieva-Thanks, 2015!

The holiday season is upon us once again and we're in full celebration mode. Even Jeff, who is British and legally not allowed to have Thanksgiving because they lost the war. But he simply loves the whipped potatoes too much to exclude him.

Which brings me to this week's theme: We, The Unbelievables, are going to share our favorite recipes with you! These are the actual recipes we will be using when we prepare this year's feast for Marissa's Home for Wayward Showgirls

  • 1 lb breakfast sausage
  • 3/4 cups margarine, melted
  • 3/4 cup finely diced onion
  • 1 1/2 cups chopped celery
  • 8 cups, soft bread cubes, divided
  • 3 teaspoons poultry seasoning
  • 1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper

  1. Place sausage in a large, deep skillet; cook over medium-high heat until evenly brown, about 10 minutes. Remove sausage from the skillet and let drain on paper towels. Combine melted margarine with the sausage drippings until there is 1 cup of drippings and margarine combined.
  2. Cook and stir onion and celery in the margarine-dripping mixture in the same skillet over medium heat until onion is tender but not browned, about 10 minutes . Stir in about 1/3 of the bread cubes. Pour onion mixture into a large bowl and stir in remaining bread cubes, sausage, poultry seasoning, and pepper. Mix well.
  3. Insert stuffing into the turkey's gaping orifice and throw the turkey in the oven . Or use a casserole dish, cover it with tin foil, and bake in the oven at 325°F for 30 minutes. Then take off the foil and bake it another 15 minutes.
  4. While waiting for it to cook, go over to Henri Petit's house and put some rotten eggs in his mailbox.
  5. Get back home and take a phone call from an upset Henri Petit, saying "Why would you do that? It's Thanksgiving!"
  6. Reply with "Do what, you disgusting, mewling, cabbage-headed infant? I'm over here making stuffing."
  7. Hang up when he says "I saw you, you dolt! And for the thousandth time, I AM NOT A..."
This recipe serves you and 11 hungry showgirls. Increase ingredients proportionately if you have more showgirls.

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