The (Unbelievable) Benefit Of Kids' Programming

You know ... there's nothing better than educational television with a twist to get the kiddies involved, aware and gung ho about learning.

That's why I think an academic, informational slant on boob tube viewing would be the way to go for the tykes.

Picture it: A lively intro and engaging narration directed right at the viewing audience to the point of enthusiasm! (Bet you didn't know Jeff, with his distinctive British accent, is the perfect man to front such voice-over interaction. He is! But any of us could step up to the task; Clark possess an intriguing command of language and I have radio announcing experience beneath my belt. Heck, week to week we could trade off to keep things fresh and interesting! Brilliant!)

The subject of our kids' programming? Why, education the Unbelievable's way of course! (Translation: Education the Unbelievable's way = FUN!)

Here are a few examples:

Revolutionary War Re-enactment

Just think of the joy learning about regimented training, wartime strategies and the mechanics of firearms! Kids like things that go boom, you know. Win, win!

Hands-On Farming

For the hard to please little ones, nothing conditions them like putting them in place of farm animals to cool their jets. With Jeff's pointed commentary, the fear of excessive, difficult equipment operation will get them to appreciate how well off they really are with their PS4s and other electronics.

Discovery At Sea Level

Kids are naturally curious. They'll be amazed at all the creepy crawlies and other things inhabiting beaches and tide pools. Careful of those poisonous sea anemones though! (The narration will learn'em.)

Rough and Ready

Nothing educates like hands-on experience. The Unbelievables unique examples of brickworking, construction and other physical activities will fine tune the clumsiest of kids, honing them to alert individuals and remove any ungainly butterfingerness.

Tools Of The Trade

Our singular and original series of heavy equipment education will have children crying "More!" when they're introduced to our step by step methodologies for troubleshooting and repairing all manner of machinery. If you're afraid of getting your hands dirty, these segments will remove any doubts.

What do you think? Terrific, I know! The kids would go wild in the streets!

"I know I have homework, mom, but I really want to tune into The Unbelievables and their nifty educational program! Can I, please?"

Yep. That could be your kid asking you to watch something that will benefit them in their delicate, formative years, something to take with them all through life. (Who knows? Maybe watching our show will benefit you, too!)

I like it!

Call Me, Maybe ...

So ... we got a comment a week ago Wednesday. A rather interesting one at that:

At the risk of identifying myself as a bad person, I find the damsels in distress at the hands of the Nazis a highly erotic concept. Also, I would like to sleep with one of the Unbelievables. Which one of those two statements is worse? - Teresa W

I don't know what Clark's take on it is - we'll find out what he has to say soon enough - but I can tell you in no uncertain terms Jeff is dead wrong with his assessment.

The comment is not a set up, it's not fake and it certainly isn't any sort of ruse. But Jeff got one thing right: The commenter's sign-off - "Teresa W" - is a pseudonym of the word "sweater" ... and an obvious nod to the fact she's enamored with The Unbelievables and our unique fashion sense.

Which one, however? Which Unbelievable does she gravitate toward?

Me, of course.

The skeptical among you (yes, I'll admit there probably are one or two of you out there) will require proof Teresa W has her sights set on yours truly. I'm more than willing to offer up foundations for my claim:

Obvious Exhibit of Proof #1: Sweater Fantastickness

 Yep. That's me all right. Burden of proof lifted. One glance at that photo and there's no further need. It's worth a thousand words, you know.

Obvious Exhibit of Proof #2: A Mountain of Stud

Oh, okay. One more picture.

Here I am in all my undercover moustachioed glory in one of The Unbelievables' more notorious cases, "Dudes." Now ... enough with the photographic evidence. Teresa W is probably reading this right now mad with desire.

Obvious Exhibit of Proof #3: Treating The Ladies Right

The Unbelievables have the distinct power to elevate the ladies ("Hello, Ladies!") to heights they never thought possible. Teresa W is no doubt aware of this. Be it a Vegas showgirl, an Unbelieva-Babe or other, credentials such as those added to your resume will get you further than you can imagine! And while Jeff and Clark are just as capable, I show special concern and added attention in those areas ... if you know what I mean.

Obvious Exhibit of Proof #4: Education
 

Speaking of job opportunities, get in good with The Unbelievables and we provide further value added services. Long ago I put together a little computer primer for the fairer sex which only a lucky few are privy to. Because you can't walk out the door of your house without bumping into a computer during your day, you might as well become knowledgeable in their workings. This is an excellent instructional guide! (Note: Dorothy Heller and June Bower were my personal ghost writers for this tome.)

You know what? I think that's plenty of proof right there as basis for the rhyme and reason of Teresa W's wants. After all, I don't want to look like a braggart.

Teresa W? Call me maybe...