I'll admit it, I fell in love with the theatuh. As usual, I did so much too quickly. What can I say, I'm impulsive. All it took to get me to commit to it was the realization that plays are just movies for people who don't have television sets. That, and the fact that you get your own chair and I was hooked.
I figured my experience as an expert crime fighting security expert with The Unbelievables would translate to instant success. However, there was a bit of a learning curve. Turns out blocking a stage production doesn't necessarily require someone watching all exits or positioning snipers. Also, the antagonists in a production are often portrayed by people just pretending to be bad, who don't merit a severe butt-kicking.
But I'm all out of cookies!
With the help of U.D.O.L.T.S, seasoned and talented actors all, we ironed out the rough spots and put on a pretty great production of Jeff's adaptation of A Christmas Carol. Unfortunately, I was unable to find roles for Jeff and Michael. But that was because I had already cast so many great actors. Virtually every part was played by multiple performers. And that's because my greatest weakness as a director is the inability to turn anyone down who comes out to audition.
Overly ambitious? Perhaps. But I would much rather commit a noble failure than...whatever the opposite of that is.
So I'm retiring and the show is closing after just one presentation, mostly because there just isn't enough parking to accommodate cast, crew and patrons. But we recorded it for posterity and here it is. Enjoy, and Happy Holidays!
One of the first things Clark did after deciding to form a theater group was to sit for hours thinking up a name for them, which in retrospect should probably have taken no more than about ten minutes. Not Clark though. After a good hour and a quarter he ran up to us, saying he'd finally reached a decision. Unimpressed about being disturbed like that during our badminton game Michael and I stopped for a moment nevertheless and duly listened politely. We knew what it was like when Clark was in one of his excitable periods and knew it wouldn't last too long. All we had to do was be patient with him. "I'm calling it the Unbelievable Dramatic & Operatic Local Theatre Society." he said, pausing to allow us time to react appropriately.
"U.D.O.L.T.S?" I said, slightly alarmed. I then composed myself while Michael smirked and heard myself offer to re-write my adaptation of A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens for his first production.
Next day I was approached by Clark again, this time dressed from head to foot in Victorian garb, asking for the script. I'd kept a few copies from the time we'd done it in college and, looking at Clark, told him he looked perfect for the part of Mr. Scratchit, the clerk with barely a penny to his name, employed by Scrooge McTightwad, the protagonist of the story.
Folks in "Victorian garb".
Clark flicked through the script and enthused over it wildly. "This is perfect! Just the job to prove ourselves with! It shall be done!" Well folks, tomorrow is opening night. Tune in Friday to see how it all went.
