What The Scheeble Happened?

The scene: The Unbelievabase, dateline: yesterday. Around 6 a.m.

A knock on the door (which is odd, since we live below a laundromat - I mean how did they get in at 6 a.m.?).

CLARK: I'll get it.

MICHAEL: OK.

CLARK: Jeff, get that for me would you please?

JEFF: Whatever... (answers door) Yes, can I help you?

LARRY SCHEEBLE (for it is he): Hi, neighbors. I just checked the pharmacy and they were out of Placidyl - about 30 years ago.

M, C & J: SCHEEBLE?!

LARRY: Yes, you noisy bastards. Tone it down, willya?

M,C & J: What th-

LARRY: I suppose you're all wondering why I, of all people, am your neighbor?

M,C & J: Well, frankly, yes.

LARRY: I, Larry Scheeble, the camp nerd from all those years ago that you mercilessly made fun of...

MICHAEL: Ulp.

LARRY: You're wondering how I managed to find out the location of your secret base, how I managed to procure the property opposite, and why I keep complaining about the noise?

JEFF: Yes.

LARRY: Well, it was pretty simple really. Don't forget, I too am a graduate of Camp Action!, the summer camp for would-be spies, crimefighters and secret agents (not to mention ninjas). And you guys all thought I was a wimpy geek who'd never amount to anything. So you made jokes about me, imitated my nerdy voice and feeble ways, and made my time at Camp Action! a living hell.

JEFF: Well, I wouldn't go that far...

LARRY: Hush! I'm talking! Despite the bad time I had at Camp Action! because of you guys, I was equipped with the same knowledge that you all were. And after graduation I enlisted for police training. then I went into the CIA, then the FBI, then MI5, MI6, KGB, VHF, and BBC. And I tracked you down. That was easy.

CLARK: But why go to all that trouble?

LARRY: You wanna know why? You wanna KNOW WHY???!!

M, C & J: Um, yes. We really wanna know.

LARRY: TO DO THIS!!! (Lunges forward, attempts to give Michael a wedgie, realises Michael is going commando, fumbles for a bit, gets red in the face, slowly backs away towards the door)

M, C & J:....

LARRY: (mumbles) Bastards... (shuts door)

MICHAEL: That was weird.

CLARK: It was, wasn't it?

A timid knock on the door.

JEFF: (opens door) YES?!

LARRY: Um... I don't suppose I could borrow a cup of sugar?

MICHAEL: Get lost, Scheeble.

LARRY: Righto. Right. Bye then. (backs off)

M, C & J: Bye. Weirdo.

Scheeble?!

Well, we knew we'd find out eventually who the utter pain was that had been leaving us notes. Oh, we made sure that that person would eventually have to cross swords with us, because we started to become extra-annoying in a bid to push this person's buttons just a little bit more. We cranked the volume on the Blaupunkt up to 11, stuck this note in the same place they were leaving notes...

and waited for the inevitable excrement to hit the air-conditioning.

However.

Little did we expect THIS.

Larry Scheeble. Yes, THE Larry Scheeble. Larry Scheeble, the nerd that Michael did merciless dead-on impersonations of when we were all at Camp Action! when we were young'uns. Suffice to say, when Larry came a-knockin' on our door to complain in person about our noise and shenanigans, we were shocked, stunned and surprised. And a little embarrassed.

What was really surprising, however, was what Larry had to say to us...