502

How does one celebrate 500 adventures? How does one celebrate 500 anything?

Well, Hampton Court Palace in England celebrated its 500-year anniversary by knocking together a few fake coaches and sticking them on the lawn...

Adam Richman celebrated his 500-pound weight loss by, um, getting naked.

Perez Hilton celebrated his 500 kilo weight loss by opening his mouth really wide. (Nothing unusual there).

So what did I do?

First, I hopped into my Galaxie 500...

  
where I listened to Peter, Paul and Mary singing 500 Miles.



Then I switched gears a little by getting into my Fiat 500...

and listening to some Galaxie 500.



Then, I went into the kitchen and perused one of my Christmas presents,

after which I went and sat in the lounge to read another good book.

Then it was time for some more music.









and one more for luck.




Five x 100 Years = 500 Years.

Then I went to bed. All that math is exhausting!

Flying high over and past 500

The celebration of the Fantastic 500 was/is one to behold, if not experience. Michael observed the occasion at 30,000 feet. Jeff did his thing, which he will tell you about on Friday. And I marked it, as well as the incoming New Year, with a night of quiet contemplation and introspection. Yes, 500 is quite an impressive milestone. But what does one do when they reach a milestone? Does one stop? Perhaps, briefly, to take note of what has come before and what may lie ahead, but no, nobody actually stops at a milestone.

"Well, we're here. I guess."

No! One continues onward and upward! or outward or down or wherever it is they're headed.

And so that's we did/do/are doing/done. As such, you can look forward to more...

Nefarious ne'er-do-wells

Fabulous femme fatales

Varoom-y vehicles (sometimes, alliteration is hard)

And the annoying little twerp Henri Petit will undoubtedly stick his misshapen malignant melon (ah, I'm back!) into things at some point.

"Ah yes, I have grand, twisted, evil plans indeed for The Unbelievables in 2016! And finally, they will pay me the respect to which I am... Hey, put me down! What are you doing? Do NOT buckle me into a car seat, place me in the back seat of a minivan and turn on 'Finding Nemo'! I keep telling you that I am an adult and I... " 

Mai-Tai In The Sky: Oh ... Might I? Might I?

Time really does fly, you know.

For example, all of a sudden you look up, the New Year has unfolded before you and it just so happens The Unbelievables have committed 500 crime-fighting adventures and other acts of derring-do.

Realizing this marker of our sometimes wild history, I knew I needed to mark the occasion. I was flying from one exotic locale to another after 2016 broke and decided a little impromptu shindig was in order. Where better than way far up in the air? Who doesn't like a surprise party at 30,000 feet? And, of course, it had to be a cocktail party ...

I made some hasty but exacting arrangements with the airline and told them of my plans. "It has to be very hush-hush so as not to spoil the surprise," I told the plane's crew after getting the okay from head honchos. (I even got a replacement captain and co-pilot so the main fliers of the ship could join in on the festivities.)

The best glassware was busted out ...

... it just so happened I had nondescript handouts to pass to everyone after we took off ...

... and I set my sites on making the official announcement.

The passengers, the entire lot, were giddy with excitement. There was almost a stampede as everyone got on the plane.

A grand time was had by all. I made it known I would be documenting the event for publication on The Unbelievables' website so there was no lack of tales to tell during the couple hour flight time. Laughter was in the air, numbers were exchanged, there was dancing in the aisles and future dates set (Airline! Matchmaking!) from start to finish.

The substitute flight crew was a little suspect: 

 
We did experience a few drops and barrel rolls during our flight. But when those came around everyone had comfortably knocked back a second highball and the giddiness evident all around superseded note of anything being amiss in the cockpit. (It did benefit that one couple doing a few break dance moves on the fly. Please pardon the pun.)

On arrival, there was backslaps and ear-to-ear grins from the front of the plane to the back. Everyone personally wished me a Happy New Year, thanked me profusely for the hospitality and made sure I planned on conveying their heartfelt sincerities to my missing colleagues.

Cocktails and non-stop laughter with a couple hundred of your (new) closest friends: Not a bad way to spend a couple hours' time from destination "A" to destination "B" ... eh? (Bonus: I recruited a few possible Unbelieva-Babes while schmoozing, too. They'll be stopping by the Unbelieva-Base  in the next week or so to fill out applications.)

If there's one thing The Unbelievables can't be limited to, it's quashing the evil plans of ne'er-do-wells 24/7. There's got to be a little give and take to break up the day, if you know what I mean.

Clark? Jeff? Take it away ...